Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 6:47 am-
I spent 27 years of my life abroad - mostly in short stints of 2-4 years - and 36 years in Canada, so I have had lots of experience with readjustment and what is called "reverse culture shock." I think the trick to readjusting is partly just patience and partly applying the same degree of tolerance to Canadians and Canadian society as one applies to foreign people and places.
Travellers often show great understanding and empathy towards foreign cultures, largely because they know in advance that there will be challenges and are prepared to understand, accept and live with the differences. It involves a certain humility in accepting that others can do things differently and be equally right.
But when we return home, we have difficulty applying the same generosity or tolerance or humility. We want things to be the way we remembered them, and after years of idealizing Canada as a fantastic place to be from, it simply cannot live up to our unrealistic expectations.
I also quickly learned that my Canadian friends and family expressed great interest in my overseas adventures but their attention span was extremely short; after a few minutes they simply lost interest and any attempt on my part to pursue the story was interpreted as conceit or arrogance. Again, one has to exercise restraint and humility about one's travels - however meaningful those experiences are to you. Eventually you will get the chance to tell your stories, but it takes time.
Meanwhile, it is worth focussing on being "just an ordinary Canadian" again, rather than being the somewhat exotic expatriate from a country everyone instinctively loves - at least until the day comes that you get another chance to travel and then the cycle begins again.
I always admired the British colonial types who could be pro-consuls or military adventurers in the tropics, but once back in London put on their three-piece suits, bowler hats and black unbrellas and blended into the crowd. It wasn't their imperialist beliefs or practices I admired but rather their understanding that they lived in two different worlds and that they had to adapt perfectly to both.
Cheers, John