not settling in well.

[snowbunny]

Am I the only one who is having trouble adapting? I have been here about 3 weeks now and I am feeling very out of place.

[Joanne]

Hello,

It's normal at first to feel like you do !!
Only 3 weeks !! You have to give yourself more time !!

It can take a lot longer than this to feel at home, it depends also of your personality...

I had to go through a few stages before I felt like this is home:
- At first I felt like I was on holidays...everything was new !
- Then I had to get a job , find a place to live ...I was a bit depressed !!
- After I was missing home a lot (friends, family, ways things are..) and comparing how things were all the time..
- But now I feel this is my home..as much as Montreal !

If I had the choice to go back I would not know what to do...In the perfect world I would be 6 months here and 6 months in Montreal..:O)

I hope this helps !!

[Susie D]

No, you're definitely not the only one. I thought I was just failing in some way because I was adapting so poorly, until I found this messageboard, and discovered it's actually quite normal to feel the cultural differences so strongly.

I'd say give it some time, and know that you're doing something very hard. Not everyone is brave enough to try living abroad, and you're to be commended for doing it. England has its charms, and I found the trick was to find my own version of Manchester rather than try to conform strictly to the English way of life. I hope that makes sense.

[mlondon]

I have yet to move to London myself, but I have friends who've lived there and most of them said it takes quite a bit of time to adjust. One friend said that I should be ready to hate it for the first 3 months. Eventually it does get better though, when I first travelled on my own I was very stressed out, but after I got through that first turmoil it turned out to be a fanstastic experience.

[snowbunny]

I am here under a fiancee visa, and it has to be the worst conditions. My partner (who is british), is at work from 7:30am to nearly 8pm a lot of nights. Leaving me to entertain myself. I have felt the people in the little town here are not very friendly.I would love to find some folks from back home to get together with onece in a while. I really miss hearing people who speak like me,and know what Tim Hortons is.

[Susie D]

Well, I've had a look at the map, and it looks like you're a ways out of Manchester. But if you're ever in town, let me know. We could probably meet up in the city centre or something. I still have my Canadian accent, and I definitely know what Tim Horton's is. (The country can't seem to grasp what a good muffin is!).

[themeone]

I think your situation would be difficult for anybody, even if they hadn't moved country. Being alone in a small town, unable to work is no fun for anyone.

I guess one way out of the isolation might be to go to some local evening classes, or maybe volunteer your time for something locally. It'll fill the time, and give you a chance to make some links with other people in the area.

[republican]

Yeah certainly ajusting is hard. I first moved from Canada when I was 10 to a small town near Liverpool and found the accents impossible to decifer! Most get used to it and ajust some go back to Canada (like I am doing) either way at least you tried and the fact that you are here and doing it is great.
I hope it works out for you but if it doesn't don't feel bad.